Is the High-Fiver Diet Right For You?

A good HIGH-FIVE helps two hearts!

In the last couple of days, I’ve received emails from two of my private mentoring clients. They both touched me because they told me that the work we’ve been doing together has led to tangible results. And they were specific about what happened, so I had a clear connection from what we did to what they got. It was an e-High-Five, and it felt great!

I’ve recently been thinking about this, because much of what I’m doing with my clients revolves around practice-building. When you talk to prospective clients, you have to let them know that you know your stuff… otherwise, why would they want to work with you? Where do you get those stories — those “high-fivers” — from?

Having  High-Fivers at your fingertips depends on hearing success stories from your clients. So the real question is, how do you get them to tell you something meaningful? How do you get them to say “something you did helped me —  something you wrote moved me — something you said inspired me” —  when it may be hard for you to ask outright? And especially when you hope for something more concrete than something!

What I’ve discovered is that — as usual — I have to start with myself !  Otherwise how can I ask, and how could I receive it if it came without asking? It’s like Gandhi telling the woman who wanted him to admonish her child not to eat sweets — “Come back in 3 days.”  What? Why? Why not tell the child now, while he’s standing there?  Because first, Gandhi had to get into his own integrity and stop eating sweets!

When was the last time you followed the “Do as I say and not as I do” rule? Yeah, I know — my memory doesn’t go back that far, either!

When you wish more people would read your blog, visit your website, let you know your work is valued or sign up for your Feldenkrais®workshop, you’re looking for a High-Fiver, and the first place to look is in the mirror.

Letting someone know how they’ve helped you creates the space for someone else to tell you the same thing. It creates an energy, a bond, a resonance, an opening.  It’s more than saying “thanks” — it’s saying:

“I just have to tell you! Last week I got 2 more clients who each signed on for 10 sessions! I’m so excited!”


“That promo you helped me with is generating a different kind of response than I am used to seeing!”

It’s also about letting someone who sends you an ezine you value know that you got something from it. It’s telling the person whose workshop you just took what you got out of it.

And it’s even okay if help yourself at the same time you give someone else juice… like when you leave a comment on a blog and it helps you raise your own website’s visibility! That’s like a Double-Dip High-Fiver! And it’s so easy that we all could be doing it!

How many lives could you change, if you went on a High-Fiver Diet??

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16 Responses to Is the High-Fiver Diet Right For You?

  1. Carol McClelland says:

    What a great reminder! I had a client make an appointment for a follow up call with me. The first thing she said…Thanks to you, I got a job in the green industry I’ve been targeting! She was soooo excited, it was great to hear.

    • Allison says:

      It does feel wonderful, Carol. And I find that for me, it’s really the juice that not only keeps me going, but allows me to keep adding value on top of value for my clients. When I know I’m appreciated, I am an endless stream of ideas and I share them freely. When I feel unacknowledged, I start contracting. And people need to celebrate their own accomplishments more, too, and all of that seems to fall under the same heading.

  2. Jozeffa Greer says:

    Hi Allison,
    Yesterday, I got a call from a potential client who had seen my website.  I know all the work we did on it has made the difference.  I truly appreciate  your help and support.

    • Allison says:

      Jozeffa, how great is that?! You’ve put so much work into your site! I’m stoked for you. I’m sure it’s just going to get better and better as you develop your blog. You are writing about important things that so many people can benefit from. Stepfamilies are the norm now, I think… isn’t it so? And nobody really knows how to succeed in one. Yours, Mine and Ours really was a movie, after all!

  3. Donna_bervinchak says:

    I love every step of the process you are taking us through.  I am learning how to be comfortable with myself and I actually can start a conversation with a stranger!  I didn’t know it could be so easy!  You have changed my life.
    Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    • Allison says:

      Donna, I know what you mean when you say that being able to start a conversation changed your life, because it changed mine, as well! I’m so happy that you found your way into the Heart-to-Heart program… I think for me, the real value is in the like skills, and getting a great practice, as Moshe said, the is the side benefit!

  4. My tendancy is to converse, email, Tweet, and/or leave a comment on Facebook re: my response to an impressive workshop or class. I’ve not gotten into Blogging on a regular basis and have been a bit shy about  commenting on other people’s Blogs. I never realized how important it could be for the person whose work I appreciate or for myself. Thank you for the enlightenment. Look out blogisphere, here I come : )

    At the beginning of a group class or private hands-on session I ask clients about how they have been since we last met.  Often someone will comment upon how they applied/observed/explored an element from our previous work together either before or after a session without my prompting. At the end of each session I encourage clients to  play with some aspect of the lesson that they found interesting or pleasurable.

    • Allison says:

      Marci, it sounds like you have a blog but it’s not regular. The search engines will take more notice if you do something on a regular basis, so if you’re interested in trying something, you could just carry a little notebook with you to write down random thoughts and just shoot up a post about them once in a while. You can link to FB when you do that, and invite people to comment. Doesn’t have to be long– 150 words is an amount people will read easily and enough to satisfy Google. Let me know if I can help!

  5. Nancyharden says:

    Even though it was difficult at first, I keep asking, and educating my clients about how to recognize changes.  This is a great reminder to apply that to myself!  Thanks!

    • Allison says:

      You’re welcome, Nancy! I know it’s paying off for you, because you’re taking off like a rocket! I’m so happy I’ve been able to help!

  6. Anonymous says:

    How right you are!  I must take this perfect opportunity to tell you, Allison, how your mentoring has benefitted me, both as a practitioner and a person.  My self-confidence has improved, I am inspired and enthusiastic about my practice, and have learned every day from the program.  I thank you so much for perceiving this need in our community, acting on it, and giving us the gift of your knowledge and expertise in this area.  I used to think I missed something in my basic training, or perhaps was just not suited to the profession, and now I see I have lots of “cohorts” who felt similarly.  Indeed life-changing!  I recommend H2H to all the practitioners I know and talk to.  Thank you!

    • Allison says:

      Kate, I really appreciate hearing this. You have been excited about the Heart-to-Heart program from the first, and I’m so glad that it’s bearing fruit for you!

  7. Carrie Lafferty says:

    Great reminder Allison—thanks for stating it so clearly!

  8. Feldenkraispt says:

    Allison, I thank you for this reminder. I’ve been inspired each time I’ve read your blogs and e-zines. This has been needed in our community, and I too thank you, for this valuable contribution to the Feldenkrais community and to the clients they serve.  Who knows what the far-reaching contributions will be. I look forward to working with you in the future for my mentoring process and blessings to you. Tammy Spitzer

  9. Frances Rosario says:

    I felt a really wonderful shift physically, energetically and emotionally as I read this. I appreciate so much how with you, my approach to the business aspect of my Feldenkrais practice is moving from being reluctant, confused and frustrated to being engaged, curious and ease-full.  Thank you so much for sharing this and all of your wisdom and love.  Frances Rosario

  10. Istandinthelight says:

    LOL Funny to read this after I decided to be the first to comment on your blog article on “your other hands brain”!

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